Recently, through countless hours of retrospection, I've developed two theories about myself. The first is that I'm more aquainted with my own life story than any person I have ever met. I could go back to age 5 and tell you everything in my life that has lead me to where I am today (before then, my memories are hazy and do not form a coherent sequence of events, though my earliest memory, Batman Returns cereal, predates age 2). I remember everything about schooling, friends, family, houses, playing, television, movies, music, books, likings, phases, etc. Someday I will recount to you all of this (over the course of a series of days or weeks), and it will blow your mind.

My second theory is that there is still merit to be found in anything I have ever liked throughout my lifetime. And I quite literally mean everything that has ever brought me joy in the past 18 years, nine months, and four days. You may question my word choice of merit. Dictionary.com defines merit as "claim to respect and praise; excellence; worth." It was by this definition that I confirmed merit as the exact word I was looking for. This all-encompassing domain of merit includes animals, dinosaurs, Power Rangers, Star Wars, Batman, Spiderman, Scooby Doo, Rugrats, Transformers, Pokémon, Digimon, Spongebob Squarepants, Disney movies, videogames, swimming pools, books, music, bicycles, rollerblades, scooters, board games, hide and seek, kickball, recess, tag, freeze tag, running, sports equipment, door bell ditching, knock knock jokes, water balloons, Nerf guns, being the smartest kid in the class, Bill Nye, early release, mechanical pencils, a good pair of jeans, chapstick, Vans originals, Kim Braun, Carly Ulrich, Leslie Steele, Jenni Martinez, Jennifer Keswick, Jaimie Lugo, Danielle Ramirez, Reneé Behan, Lacey Burns, and Jackie Aldern.

Upon realizing this, I made it my purpose to never again refute something I like or used to like in fear of what people will think about me. I have done it many times throughout my life, and it brings great shame. In first grade some guys in my class made fun of me because I admitted to liking pop sensation Hanson and their catchy and infectiously fun hit "MMMBop." They laughed at me, and I cried. Since then, I have been cautious about letting others know what things I really like, in fear of further embarrassment or humiliation. In fourth grade I denied liking Digimon because Erica Cordova said it was "for babies." Eventually I would ditch Neil Boyer as a friend because of similar situations. Erica fucking Cordova. Not at this time nor at any time in the future will I care one iota about her, so why should I give a shit what she thinks? Never again. From this day forward I will never refute something I like in order to shape someone else's image of me. I will leave you with these life-altering quotes.

Stick to your guns. - Anonymous

I 'yams whats I ams, and dats all that I 'yams. - Popeye

Every day and in every way, I am getting better and better. - Émile Coué

This is the end of my second day living in the community dorms at Fresno State. Well, I suppose it's really only Day One since the first day only begins when you wake up in a foreign place. I'm a firm believer in Day Zero.

Most people aren't in the dorms yet. Right now, it's really only people in Smittcamp, sports, or band that've moved in already. So tomorrow all the dumb, unathletic, tone-def residents move in. Jplay, everyone is special in his or her own way.

My roommate is coming tomorrow. I don't really know anything about him. I know that his name is David Tran, and I think he may be Asian. If he can help me hack into Francisco's wireless network then we will be good friends I'm sure.

You see, at the moment, I do not have internet in my room. I'm sitting in a chair in the Junction. Don't be fooled by the semi-cool name, it's no groovy hangout. It's actually just the end of my hallway that happens to pick up the bulldog network.

More to come...

Tonight was refreshing to say the least. I earned style points for dipping my fries in my V shake at In N Out. And that's not something I usually do. It just felt right.

Something fell into place for me.